It’s in the timing

How do I express the passion within?
How do I let go of the long held defence?
If I show my inside, the yearning, longing...
For more and more of you.
Will they scoff as so many have before?
Saturday of Easter week seems the perfect time,
To think of waiting
Of timing
Of chronos and kairos
The seconds of the day I waste
Thinking of more waiting.
The emptiness of this Saturday
Begs to be explored
The waiting of the disciples
Unsure now, of what they were waiting for
They had left their good jobs and homes
To follow their leader and now...
Well he was dead
The ministry finished.
How did that feel?
Later there would be disbelief, doubt, rejoicing
Barbequed fish and running to tell
But now on this day
Emptiness reigns
How long can a day actually be?
As each second feels like a minute
And the hours take forever to come.
Going back is not an option
Matt just can't collect tax no more
Taking this hollow Saturday
To reflect and pray
And ask what do you want from me, next?